Young Children and Divorce
Tips for parents regarding "Young Children and Divorce"
- The parents should not talk about one another's problems or faults with young children
- The parents should restore confidence in young children that both the parents love the children and would remain their parents even after the divorce
- Both the parents should acknowledge with the children that the divorce would be sad and upsetting for all those involved
- The parents must tell the children that it is not their (i.e. children's) fault that the divorce has taken place
- The parents must try to maintain all issues in a simple and straightforward manner
- The parents should not retain the decision of divorce a secret from the young children. They (the parents) must not wait till the last minute to reveal this fact to the children
Behavioral facts related to "Young Children and Divorce"
- Young children experience hurdles in their own relationships
- The children develop problems of self esteem
- The performance of such children in school is hampered
- They have a feeling of profound loss and sadness
- Some withdrawal symptoms may be felt
- Their behavior is marked by aggression and un-cooperation
- There are signs of distress
Psychotherapy for Young Children of Divorce
When a couple gets divorced, the ongoing commitment of this couple towards the welfare of their children is very crucial. Psychotherapy plays a major role as assistance to the parents as well as their children. When the child shows symptoms of distress, the parents should visit a pediatrician or family doctor. This physician can suggest evaluation and treatment from a "Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist." This psychiatrist can suggest the parents some remedies to ease the strain of the divorce on the complete family unit.
Conversations of parents with young children regarding divorce
- The most crucial point that the children should feel that they are an important section of the lives of their parents. For this, the parents must be available to talk with their children patiently. While talking, the parents must maintain love and reassurance
- Sometimes children ask questions that are tough to answer. The parents should maintain a truthful and honest approach in the answers. However, there is no need to be specific
- One parent should never ask the child what the other parent is doing
- One parent should not speak in a negative manner about the other parent with the child
- The parents should never place their children in the role of spies. This causes the children to be placed in an awkward position that results in much pain for the children
- It is very vital that the parents tell the children that the decision to divorce is final and the children can't do anything about it. Further, the parents should explain which conditions would remain the same for the children and which would be different. The details of the divorce should not be divulged. While speaking about all these points, the parents must maintain a simple, relaxed and calm attitude
- The parents must always welcome the queries of their children and answer in the best possible manner. The children desire to know if their fundamental requirements would be fulfilled. Moreover, if they would still be loved, cared for and fed. The reason of these thoughts is that the children feel that their world is shifting
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