Marriage Counseling and Divorce

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Very few people are naturally endowed with relationship skills that are essential for solving problems and maintaining a marriage. In such circumstances, a marriage counselor can suggest new methods of fulfilling the individual requirements and finding solutions to problems in marital life.

Advantage of Marriage Counseling

• The counselor assists you to develop a profound understanding of what you are, what your spouse is and what your respective requirements are.. Using this knowledge, you can conclude which needs can be fulfilled in the marriage and which cannot be

• After counseling, you can conclude whether your spouse is ready to collaborate and solve the conflicting issues or whether your spouse is reluctant in this regard. Accordingly, you can take the decision to leave your spouse without any feeling of guilt

• Marriage counseling provides a secure atmosphere to express your sorrow

• The Counselor guides you on how to be assertive without any hint of offensiveness. This will help you to speak regarding the conflicting issues with your spouse without having any fear of hurting his / her feelings. During counseling, you can learn how to procure what is required without making demands or engaging in conflict

• The counselor teaches you how to discuss your requirements with your spouse candidly, clearly and without getting angry or showing resentment

• During counseling, you can be trained in communication skills that would enable you to find solutions in a healthy way. For this, you need to hear and process what your spouse has to say

• You need to speak and convince your spouse that both should take a combined appointment of a marriage counselor. Such a mutual decision may require some long and painful conversations

• Both partners should find a mutually agreeable marriage counselor who can be trusted. If one of the partners is suspicious that the counselor is not objective, then he / she would not believe that counseling would work successfully

• The spouses must bear in mind that marriage counseling would take some time to show results. Usually a problem builds up between the spouses over some months or years. It is thus, unwise to think that it would be overcome in 1 or 2 visits

• As the marriage counseling sessions proceed, the spouses must evaluate the progress in their marital life. They must discuss whether their marital problems are getting diminished. If this is not the case, they may try another counselor or some other option. The general observation is that within a few weeks of counseling, the spouses learn some points that are useful to continue the marriage

• The spouses must have a positive attitude towards counseling. They must always think that their marital problems can be resolved. The spouses must be attracted towards the reward of successful marriage counseling i.e. they would get a loving partner with whom they can grow old

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