Marriage Divorce and Children's Adjustment

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The adjustment of children post divorce becomes challenging due to one or more of the following reasons.

• Involvement of non custodial father
• Psychological adjustment and parenting practices of the custodial parent (in most cases it is the mother)
• Parental conflict
• Loss of family income

Tips about Marriage Divorce and Children's Adjustment

• If there are too many arguments between the parents in presence of the children, this results in poor adjustment of children after divorce

• If the parents maintain and increase the number of positive events in the life of the child (like involvement in after school activities), there are better chances of adjustment for the child after divorce. The reason is that stable schedules and events make the child develop an opinion that the world is dependable and predictable

• If the parents offer the child a consistent bedtime, rules and restrictions about television shows and off limit foods, the child feels that the world is dependable and stable

• The child must not feel any guilt about switching between the custodial and non custodial parent's residences. The parents must not exhibit any dispute or bitterness about this schedule

Marriage Divorce and Children's Adjustment as per Gender

• The most consequential factor connecting divorce and a girl's antisocial demeanor is her mother's parenting style. The level of her father's parenting has little impact on this connection

• Dispute between parents before the divorce raises the possibility of depression in boys. Such a parental conflict is interpreted as a threat of parental loss by the male child and is disturbing for him

• Dispute between parents after the divorce increases a girl child's risk of developing conduct problems. Fighting between the parents results in emotional anxiety for the girl child and she exhibits in her deviant behavior. Moreover, dispute between the parents becomes a role model for the girl and she thinks it is legitimate to display antisocial attitude towards marriage

• Boys may develop external problems due to a bad quality of the custodial mother's parenting and the father's involvement in parenting

• Divorce may result in the adverse effects on both boys and girls in the following ways
  • Substance abuse
  • Delinquency
  • Early entry into sexual activity
  • Lower levels of academic achievement
• Although the boys in divorced families have mothers who execute competent parenting and display positive psychological adjustment, these boys show more depression than their peers in intact families

• Boys are more emotionally disturbed than girls due to parental divorce

• If the non custodial father displays active engagement (and not just contact) in the role of a parent, it would considerably decrease the possibility of conduct problems for the boy child

• For both boys and girls, the quality of the mother's parenting nullifies much of the connection between divorce and adjustment

• If the father simply shares a considerable time with the children and play the role of a mate, it does not impact the development of the children. It is necessary, particularly in the case of boys, that father continues to be actively involved as a parent

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